Mexican-American, But No Hablo Espanol

As long as I remember the time when my mother and I grew up, I felt that people near us and some families were very difficult for my sister, brother, I could not speak Spanish. My mother and father grew up in a popular language among my family and colleagues. I learned the basics of growth, but I did not have enough communication. This topic appeared on a certain night after school. I went to school that morning and was ready for the first day after a break and when pulled out of the classroom by a woman I had never seen before. She belongs to the ESL division and said that we are going to play some games. Then she went on turning over the bunch of flash cards with the text I could not understand. "Godot" She said, pointing to the Deb guy on the card. "flaco," she said, pointing to a tall, tall man next to him. I can not understand what she is saying, I told her I can not speak Spanish. "Can not you speak Spanish Mr. Yañez?" I remember asking her the most rough face. She made my tongue feel like I betrayed my face. name

Ever since, I felt a similar pain over and over, that night I returned home and asked my mother why I could not understand the language. When she and her family moved to the Central Valley, she told me that my grandmother was trying to learn English. My mother learns English from TV and school and tells my grandmother after work. My mother told me how difficult it is for my grandmother to learn English and understand English. For my mother and grandmother, Spanish is the first language, English is the second language, she wants to change

Now that I get old I am facing a lot of ridicule when I "check" Hispanic boxes. I do not see the Mexican descendants, and when I speak of this word I can not hear Mexican, I went to Mexico only once. I am familiar with Spanish. It is called "white people 's washing", "white boys", or the worst "pocho", when it tries to express Mexico it turns white, and vice versa.

My children understand their traditions and are proud to be Mexican Americans. Regardless of the mother's nationality, my children will know the struggle for immigrant farm work They marched with Cemar Chavez of Semar and their grandmother graduated from the first college in our family 3 Children are doing the same thing or doing it. My skin is very light, but my blood is brown (figure), "¡Viva La Raza!"

But this is nothing. It is I think that I am worse. When my Mexican patient understands everything I said, "I do not have habloinglés" and "espeak eSpanish", I will not cry; these oyibo talk to me treat me When Americans said, "Go home, you are very African." Returning home, the road is very bad. In the league we will sum up the money to fix the road. Last year, we built a school for girls where your father is. They do not have high school! Next year, I will establish a community center for employees. The government did not give us anything. Maybe it is due to the war. I do not know. I am not participating in politics

Let's be a lawyer or a doctor. My best friend's names are Heidi, Leslie and Kim. They told me I do not seem to be "Mexicans" against them, I used it as a compliment. I like to see Latin clerks and face of waitresses, yes, even our maids do not say "a little Habro Espanol." This makes me feel very much. This makes me feel American. This makes me feel white. As I move away from Spanish, I think that the stereotype will be far from me. Then there was an objection. Society has changed over 20 years after trying to separate itself from the fixed idea I made. The nation changed the view of national identity. The university professor began teaching history through the eyes of African Americans and Native Americans. The children forgot the furnace and told me to draw America as a colorful quilt. Comic strip suddenly has muscle, I do not know where to adapt.